Once Again... Part Three...

First.. Let me start by saying: That whole "Part (whatever) tomorrow" shit?

Sorry.

Life.

Moving on...

Donald Lord was at it again.

Turns out, he was calling and e-mailing McDonald's Corporate once more, six months into my transfer.. Saying I should be`FIRED, and all they did was transfer me... blah blah blah. For the love of Pete.... What the fuck did I do to this guy? It seems pretty far fetched to believe that he has such a raging hard on for destroying my life, unless you stop to consider the very likely possibility that he's slipping his cock into the child molesting whore.. Let's face it... A dude's gotta defend his fucking girlfriend, Right?

How on Earth did I learn that this Dickwad was after my job again, you may ask?

Little did I know that my tenure with the world's largest Quick Service Restaurant was coming to an abrupt halt, regardless. I was clearly sent to Epsom to be driven out. And that is ultimately what happened.

Every Second Assistant Manager that has been sent there in the last 3 years has been gone within six months. Why? They've either been driven to tears, coerced into violence, or fired for some ridiculous bullshit that was very obviously concocted in the brain of the store's evil, Fraggle looking cunt bag of a First Assistant... Now, I don't wanna name names, but it starts with:

Judi Bluto.

I know I've mentioned her on the podcast before... Either way... I was a goner the second they decided to ship me there.

A week after my last day, when I finally calmed down enough to actually talk to one of my former coworkers, I decided to break my silence about the situation to Ty... We spoke honestly with each other about the whole situation and came to the conclusion that it (my leaving the company) was ultimately the best decision for all parties... So, during the conversation, she mentions something I wasn't aware of. Seems Mr. Lord made another complaint. I didn't see it. But I guess (according to her) he went apeshit. He scolded them for not firing me 6 months prior, let them know about all of "the horrible shit I say around my daughter" and provided detailed directions to Project MAYHAM and the podcast, so they could "see/hear for themselves". Again.. They knew better. But... That ain't the fucking point.

So...

Just for shits and grins.. My former area supervisor actually sat down during his lunch one day and listened to a whole episode. He kinda dug it. Just saying.

Fast Forward to the second week of my employment with my former competitor. Now... I wanted to start fresh. You know... After all of the drama at McDonald's, I just wanted to keep what I did on my own time private. Keep it sorta "professional"... I didn't tell them about the blog, the podcast... NOT A THING. Then one day, I roll in at five in the morning to my training manager asking me how well Kim and myself were getting along these days....

Hmmm...

I'll get into the history involving my training manager...

Quickly... She's been my friend for years. She was in court on my behalf last summer during the Domestic Violence shit, not only because she had seen our (completely non-violent) dynamic behind closed doors, but alsoooo... wait for it... She's the mother of the kid that Kim babysat for 6 months, without knowing that it was unlawful for her to do so.... Which resulted in a probation violation, and landed my loving ex-wife in the clink for two months. She was also one of the people that Don sent messages to.

Needless to say... She was aware of the history. Her boss, also my brand spanking new boss, was not. Turns out Dunks got an email. Yup. Saying ridiculous shit like how, if I were ever to transfer to Alton, they would lose business... How they should keep me away from underage girls... Directions to the blog/podcast, etc.

I think you know where this is going. The difference is: These guys don't know me from a hole in the wall. They just hired me off the street to run one of their restaurants. Now they're getting "customer complaints" from this fucking guy, saying who the fuck knows what.

So there I am.. in panic mode. I'm calling Arielle... Defcon 4. Shut It Down. I had her take down Episode 12. I'm trying to get a hold of Big Cat at 7am to let him know that we have to suspend production until further notice. (Which, based on his disappearance the last few weeks, I think he took that shit seriously.) I'm scrambling around, trying to secure an alternate spot for Project MayHAM... This is exactly why I didn't want any of these guys to know about any of this shit. I don't need this Hell following me everywhere. Yet... Here I am, worrying that I may lose my job cuz' my new bosses don't know the history, and are taking this complaint seriously..

That's IT.

Next post... the aftermath.

And I'm putting out the call.

Once Again.. Part Two

It was bad enough that my work performance was pretty close to dogshit during this debacle. In February, I had graduated Hamburger University in Chicago, IL. When I left Chicago, my wallet was the one that said "BAD MOTHERFUCKER" on it. I was on the fast track. As far as I was concerned, I was at the top of my game, professionally. Personal problems? Fuck that. Leave it at the door.

When the Domestic Violence shit hit the fan.. The wheels came off. Everything just fell apart. There was no more "leaving it at the door". I missed my kids sooo fucking much, I was sleeping in the woods. I couldn't focus. At one point I burst into tears trying to make a McFlurry. I dropped the dessert on the floor and scrambled to the office... I remember breaking down to Bilo, sobbing in the parking lot about how "Two months ago, nobody could touch me.. Now I can't even make an ice cream" It was sooo true. I was useless. That was the worst part. Up until that point, when everything else was falling apart, I could always count on excelling at work. That shit comes easy to me. Always has. When suddenly, that shit wasn't happening either... My confidence was completely destroyed.

On top of that... instead of trying to doing my job, I'm outside for six hours a day on the phone. Cops, Lawyers, my mother.. It was never ending. I justified it in my head...

Looking back on it now, I see it from both sides. First, I was fiercely loyal to that company for many years. I went the extra mile for them on countless occasions. I lived and breathed that restaurant. When they wanted something, they got it. When they needed something, there was no question. When I was transferred to a store 45 more minutes away from my house, I didn't squawk. "No problem." "Whatever you guys need." I did the work of a First Assistant for a year before they promoted me. I'd proven my loyalty, and it seemed like maybe.. just maybe... someone in that organization other than Ty would have some compassion for my situation... Maybe even some fucking patience during this excruciating ordeal. Hell.. Maybe they had some. But it only took a couple of months before I was demoted and shipped off to Epsom.. The beginning of the end. I never recovered.

But, honestly...?

I was horrible.

I should have taken a leave of absence or something. Those guys paid me decent money every week to chain smoke, give statements to the police, seek advice from my friends and family and strategize with The Bulldog. Ty could only make excuses for me for so long... She warned me, but my head was crammed too far up my own ass to hear her cries... My biggest regret last summer was putting one of my best friends in such an unfair, awkward position. She knew I was a mess... And I knew she knew that I was a mess, and why. So, rather than sucking it the fuck up and pulling myself outta the shit, I looked to her (and her alone) to swat away the vultures circling around my soon-to-be McCorpse, and continued my downward spiral...

Then, as if only to add insult to injury... This fucking guy crosses the line.

Part 3 tomorrow...

Just When Ya Think You've Had Enough....

... They Bend You Over And Fuck You Once Again.

Part ONE

The past couple of weeks have been a whirlwind. I'm working at my own store now... about four weeks ahead of schedule.

Everything is going great.

Until yesterday...

Now... I realize not very many people are aware that the guy that my ex-wife is living with is our biggest fan. By that, I mean... He is spreading the fucking word. But NOT in a positive way. I haven't, up until now, been specific when referring to the guy on Project MayHAM. I have to be careful. But here? Who cares?

The contents of the blog were introduced as evidence of my "unstable mental state" in court. I was accused of being an irresponsible drunk, who "bashed" my ex wife on my blog incessantly. Apparently, publishing my written account of the actual events that took place is considered "bashing"...

Who Knew...???

Since then, I've been really careful when speaking my mind about shit, not to drop names.

That is the main reason for my absence for months. My hands were tied...

The Bulldog said "Keep your fuckin' mouth shut", and I did.

Big Cat doesn't give a shit... So I let him say what needed to be said for the summer.

Last summer was a shit show.

Long story (kinda) short, I attempted to legally kick my wife out of my house, when our screaming matches became A. Too unbearable and B. A regular occurance in front of the kids... And I wasn't letting my kids watch us crumble like my parents let me witness.

Fuck That. The reason I waited so long to finally get rid of the cunt was the kids. I didn't want them to go through what I went through as a kid. "... So I dealt with the bullshit for way longer than I should have. It became about "What was worse?" Staying together, or blowing it all up? I chose the former and was accused of Domestic Violence.

Restraining Order.

Bang.

Done.

No home, no kids... NOTHING.

I lived in my truck for 2 months.

That's when this fucking guy started his shit.

Donald Lord was a neighbor of ours.

He lived a couple of houses down from us. My ex-wife would go over with the kids,while I was at work, and hang out with him and his family. Every once in a while, when his van wouldn't start, I'd give him a ride to the store... In return, if I was at work and Kim needed to go to an appointment or whatever, he would give her a lift.

I would half joke that Don was "Her Boyfriend"... just busting balls. He was always giving her rides places in his van.

There were three reasons I never really gave it a second thought.

1. He seemed very effeminate.

2. He (allegedly) has Multiple Sclerosis, and is physically a complete fucking mess.

3. He's been married for 25 years... with several kids, and his family seemed pretty happy and nice.

A couple of years ago, during an ice storm, the power went out for a few days, and all four of us slept at their house where they still had heat.

When they moved, Kim and the girls would go to their house while I was at work... They'd go swimming and shit. No big deal.

Other than bustin' chops about my wife riding all over God's creation with her boyfriend in a van, I never had a discouraging word to say about the fucking guy.

Then, when all of this Restraining Order shit goes down, she's staying at their house with the kids, and he's all over facebook talking about how I won't even send her $50 so my kids can eat.

He's sending private messages to everyone I know, telling them how "I beat the shit out of my wife, now I'm ignoring and neglecting my kids so I can run around fucking my 20 year old girlfriend.(which was considered adultery)"... The "adultery" part should give you a pretty good idea of what I'm dealing with here..He clearly bought the lies she sold him. What he didn't realize, was there was a Restraining Order in place. Not only could I not come within 100 feet of my wife, I couldn't contact her at all. Not even through a third party. Had I given a friend a hundred bucks to go get the kids groceries, that fat cunt could have had me arrested on the spot. My visitation with the kids was taken away because of "my history of alcoholism". If I saw them on the street, I couldn't even wave to them. Now I'm getting all of these messages from people I don't know... telling me what a piece of fucking shit I am.

The cops investigated the DV allegations, and once it became clear to them that it never happened, no charges were ever filed.

That didn't stop Donald Lord... Oh No.

He cried up and down that the Alton Police Department let me off because "I gave them free food at my work"..

He sent an email to McDonald's... Yup, that's right. The Corporate Customer Complaint Department. He complained that there was a manager that works at McDonald's (He gave my name...) who drives a (My Truck) with a license plate that says "MAYHAM" who routinely drinks in the parking lot after hours. He claimed that he lives across the street and has witnessed this firsthand... and his only concern is this activity being performed in such close proximity to his very impressionable children. After repeated attempts to alert the local police department, it has become clear that they are unwilling to prosecute me because A. My wife is a registered sex offender, and B. I give them free food...He said that it was deplorable that such a large company like McDonald's would continue to employ such a blatant degenerate.

So, great. First you complain that I'm not supporting my children... Now you're trying to remove my means of doing so...

Brilliant.

Fortunately... My boss (and her boss) have known and worked with me for several years, and knew that his claims were complete nonsense....

The plot thickens...

Part 2 tomorrow....

Is This Love?

Today was my first day on the floor. It's surprising how insanely easy this shit is. I was told that the sandwich station is the hardest shit to get down. Really? Are you kidding me? Maybe it's the the whole "makin' Big Macs for the last ten years" thing... I'm not sure... But, I got it down in twenty minutes. There are kids that have worked there for months... hell.. YEARS... and they still don't fully grasp it.

Anyway... Enough tootin' my own horn. I'm diggin' it. I'm still kinda tentative about making this thing a career, though. Too much happened at McDonald's for me to be totally sold. It's a combination of the way I was treated in the throes of my messy divorce by the company I've been fiercely loyal to since 2003, and the almost instinctual cynicism towards their business model. You gotta figure, I've been practically trained to consider them fucking amateurs compared to the almighty Arches. So, everything I do or observe is through a certain lens. It could be a completely positive, fruitful relationship going forward, but for right now, I'm keeping one hand on the dock.

So... since only a select few even know about this blog, I'm gonna be putting a few things up here on HWB that were originally intended for Project MayHAM, but never got published because the heat was waaaay too fucking high there ... Shit... still is. For example... The FULL explanation concerning my leave of absence, " Love Always, Your Manipulative Whore Of A Cunt..." The " Veritable Bomb Of White Trash Knowledge" that Mr. Cat promised I'd drop, but never did. There are a ton of eyes over there. The divorce ain't final yet. Just covering my ass.

On that note, I bid you farewell. Stay tuned for more podcasts. By more, I mean different. Big Cat's recent move has made it way less convenient for him to pop down here frequently to record, and I have an itch that needs scratching. Maybe just me... Maybe me with other people... Who the fuck knows. Rest assured, it will be part of the "MAYHAM Network"...

I Find Myself Wondering Already...

... If 5 Guys Burgers And Fries Is Hiring...

I now get up at the same time i went to bed 2 days ago.

Fuck My Life.

It Is What It Is...

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